Diamonds are forever. And they suck.

Am I the only one who absolutely despises the holiday diamond commercials?? I can't be. Yet they keep making new ones. New stupid commercials with blubbering women and weirdly chiseled men getting all amorous over really ugly jewelry. (And this isn't a commentary on how diamonds aren't actually all that rare and they are a totally socially constructed "bauble of love" - even though that commentary would be accurate, that isn't my point at the moment). My point is, I don't care if he went to Jared or if every kiss begins with a "k" or if diamonds are forever and the only way to show true love and the only way to properly reward the mother of your children or WHATEVER. I would much rather see fewer diamond commercials and more beer commercials. Or, commercials starring scruffy men who sing love songs directed at me. Or commercials about freaking fertilizer. ENOUGH with the diamonds. You really want to show me you love me? Get me some bubbly, a nice wedge of triple creme brie, and some sort of delicious French dessert - then pop in a movie (preferably something with animation or really sappy acting or cheerleading/dance moves) and pig out with me. THAT is my holiday commercial pitch. Women all over the world would *swoon*. Trust me.