Can't wait for August!

Ok so usually horoscopes are kind of wishy-washy and rarely are they specific. "You will do well to watch your finances this month and be kind to your friends" or some such crap. Really? I should watch what I spend and not be an asshole? Great, thanks. Actually, the Chinese horoscopes on Facebook are quite good - well, once it told Eddie that he was going to break his femur, which was odd, but super specific, right? So as I was getting my Bobcut today, I read the crappy magazines at the salon (Bobcuts take about 3 hours. I have a lot of hair and bleach takes some time.) and lo and behold my awesome horoscope for August:

You will have a sexual encounter of the "shock and awe" variety.

Thanks Marie-Claire. You.Rule.

WSotD - "a Song that Really Needs a New Title" Edition

I can't believe this song has never been a WSotD before. Seriously. I heard it while I was not studying and getting a manicure (random, right??) and thought to myself, "OMG this is the best song ever, and it SO needs a new title." Because the current title makes it sound sweet, and loving, and well, a bit creepy. Because "All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You" - well, really? I mean, don't you maybe want to take a break and have a sammich? Or go to a movie (like Batman? Which was freaking amazing!!!)? Or take the dog out? I mean, that is a whole lot of love-making. Anyway, here it is, my comments included.

It was a rainy night
When he came into sight,
Standing by the road,
No umbrella, no coat.
So I pulled up alongside
And I offered him a ride.
He accepted with a smile,
So we drove for a while. (Well, that's kind. I mean, stupid, but kind. he could be an axe murderer, or that guy from the Lifetime movie who assaults the nice woman who picks him up and then she is inexplicably pregnant later and her friends wonder why she never mentioned the attack and it is a MESS I tell you . . . ahem, moving on)
I didnt ask him his name,
This lonely boy in the rain.
Fate, tell me its right,
Is this love at first sight? (Love? Really? Oh, I see where this is going. Hmm, not sure it's a great idea, but carry on)
Please dont make it wrong,
Just stay for the night.

All I wanna do is make love to you
Say you will
You want me too
All I wanna do is make love to you
Ive got lovin arms to hold on to (OK, clearly, this is where the song goes awry. I mean, sex and making love are not the same thing in AH's book. Shouldn't the actual verse go something like, "All wanna do is f*ck your brains out, random stranger who I don't know or love but who is apparently hot and sort of emo"?? I guess she wants to avoid the judgment that would come along with such a statement, but it seems more accurate to me.)

So we found this hotel,
It was a place I knew well (Oooh, not the first time you have picked up a lonely emo boy? You minx you!)
We made magic that night.
Oh, he did everything right
He brought the woman out of me,
So many times, easily (Ah, appealing to all the ladies in the world with the random stranger who is gifted in talents of the multi-O. Loves it.)
And in the morning when he woke all
I left him was a note (And what did you say? Order room service on me - I hear the blueberry pancakes are phenomenal? Thanks for the lovin', now you are stuck in some random motel, be out by noon?)
I told him
I am the flower you are the seed
We walked in the garden
We planted a tree (Oh. That is a rather stupid note. I mean, I think that is what people used to tell their kids when they asked where babies come from. I got the book "Where Did I Come From?" which is a phenomenal book with hilarious cartoon people. I freaked out my older sister's boyfriend by giving it to him to read while he waited for her to get ready for a date once - I was like 3, so shush . . . but I digress)
Dont try to find me,
Please dont you dare
Just live in my memory,
You'll always be there

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love was all we knew
All I wanna do is make love to you
Ive got lovin arms to hold on to

Oh, oooh, we made love
Love like strangers (LIKE strangers? I mean, don't you mean AS strangers? No? Okay . . .)
All night long
We made love

Then it happened one day,
We came round the same way
You can imagine his surprise
When he saw his own eyes
I said please, please understand
Im in love with another man
And what he couldnt give me
Was the one little thing that you can (Ahhh it all comes together now! You didn't just want a fling, you also wanted a sperm donor! Well I mean, that really changes the lyrics. Now it should go something like "All I wanna do is get preggers but the other dude is shooting blanks so can you help me out in this dirty motel it will make a great story for the kids" or something. Maybe something a tad more romantic?)

All I wanna do is make love to you
One night of love was all we knew
All I wanna do is make love to you
Say you will, you want me too

All night long
All night long
All night long
All night long

Phew. I mean, pure lyrical genius, no? That is the kind of song you can absolutely belt out whilst driving along a rainy road, hoping you won't see some creepy hot stranger on the side. Because if you do, KEEP DRIVING. The stranger in the song may have been nice, but I am thinking 99.9% of the time you are going to end up with a total weirdo and the only thing you will have to remember from the experience is some sort of nasty rash. Ew.

Happy Burphday!

Today is Murphy's 3rd birthday. He doesn't really seem all that fazed by the whole experience - in fact, he is pretty much just snoozing on my shoulder, getting fur all over the back of the couch. He is such a spoiled little mutt. But for the Murph I shall take a few minutes away from studying Contracts (don't EVEN get me started on the Statute of Frauds, why does everyone else seem to understand this? UGH.) and tell the blogosphere about my adoration for my pup.

Murphy came to live with me one fine week in September of 2005 (my very first semester of law school). I was supposed to be "taking care of him" for one week until he was sold at a fundraiser (puppies make tons of money at those things). I was pretty excited, since lab puppies are freaking adorable. I didn't know what color or gender he would be, so I decided to call the new pup "Murphy" because it popped into my head and seemed like it was a good "all-purpose" name (I should have known then there was no way I was giving him up). The poor thing was completely terrified and discombobulated - he missed his 10 brothers and sisters and immediately latched on to me, never once letting me out of his sight. I had so much fun taking him out for his 2 am walks, getting him a crate, watching him tear every blanket into shreds, etc. all while trying to figure out the ins and outs of CivPro. At the prompting of Daisy, who promised ever so earnestly that she would help with the puppy-raising, I promptly gave the folks running the fundraiser some cash to keep Murphy off the auction block.

The first year was rough, I won't lie. Murphy was the most stubborn little turd about certain things (namely, house breaking - dear GOD he didn't understand that he was supposed to pee outside until he was almost 8 months old!). He shredded any towel, blanket, or pad you put in his crate, as if he wanted to lie on the hard bottom rather than have a nice bed. He ate my very favorite pair of winter boots, and would demolish any water bottles he could get his teeth into. He simply enjoyed ripping things to shreds, no matter how much exercise he had. He barked incessantly while in his cage or in the car, and delighted in yapping until I filled his water bowl, then flipping it over. In short, I thought I had made a huge mistake.

But then there were the adorable things. The way he fell asleep on my tummy every day. His cute face poking around the shower curtain (and the occasional giant puppy actually joining you IN the shower, just to make sure you were okay). The snuffles (basically poking you in the face repeatedly with his nose, he wasn't much of a kisser). His utter and complete fear of all felines and squirrels and Christmas decorations. And I just knew I couldn't give up on him, no matter what.

So here we are, 3 years later. I am done with law school (and soon the bar, eek). Murphy has grown into an outstanding, handsome, and wickedly smart dog. He reads emotions in an uncanny way, and understands so many words that sometimes I think he could talk if he tried. He knows to bring me his leash AND my gloves when he wants a winter walk and knows that I get one or two "snoozes" every morning so he has to be patient and snuggle for a few extra minutes. He thinks he is a lap dog, and gets fur on every surface possible. Murphy was one of the best things to come into my life, and has made me more compassionate and patient and happy to be covered in slobber and unable to wear white. So here's to the Murph, who certainly can't read this but is getting extra treats today - happy birthday, pup!!!

In case anyone still visits this sad, dusty little corner . . .

I am here. And fine, just busy with the bar (though I do not have laminated copies of outlines in my shower. I like showering in my shower, not studying). In other news (short news - my brain is pretty fried):

* SHGG totally purposefully did all of his lunges in front of me today whilst I toiled away on the treadmill. It was much appreciated. And he got a haircut, also much appreciated. WTG, SHGG.
* The people at the all-star game look even more bored than me. How sad.
* Bacon is good. Pizza is good. Bacon on pizza is fantastic but made me really thirsty all evening.
* Speaking of thirsty, Powerade Zero is phenomenal. Don't listen to what Daisy tells you - it is delicious. I cannot stop drinking it.
* There are at least 5 new SmartCars in my neighborhood, I feel as though we are being invaded. But they are pretty darned cute. Cuter than my soon-to-be-sold gas guzzler.
* Seriously, is this game still on?

That's about it. My life is currently running, studying, and walking Murphy - so my only observations come from those things. And being excited that Eddie and Finchy are moving here. And that we are getting hockey tickets. And that I am going to Lollapalooza and Austin City Limits. And on a river rafting trip. So actually, lots of fun stuff, as soon as this stupid bar is out of the way.

This game is never ending.

happy birthday, siiiigh

Yep, it's my bday. I get to take a practice multiple choice test all day. And then not have a party. And not get to see my family. And not get presents because I am really too old for that and I would rather do cool things than get presents (except that painting I asked aMOMymous for - it is rad). I have spent the last several birthdays vacationing in Las Vegas and San Diego and Scottsdale and having fabulous dinners and lots of family time, and I just realized I am grouchy because I really want to have dinner with my mom and dad and it isn't going to happen. And I want my birthday secret-recipe rum cake (ooh, maybe one is in the mail??) Sigh.

But I do get to be happy that Eddie and Finchy (or HASWOE, whichever) are moving here and eagerly await football (it isn't that far away) and all of the fun concerts I have planned to go to (instead of seeking gainful employment) and hang out with Murphy (who is being supremely awesome at the moment, so cute) and have more BBQs before the summer is out and go on vacation with my dad and finally run again now that my toe stitches are out. So I guess I don't get to be too grumpy just because my bday is going to be lame. But if YOU don't have to study for the bar tomorrow, go out and do something summery and fun. And if you are joining me for the lamest July 7th EVER, let's have drinks this weekend to make up for it. Yay.

Ooh Internets!

Yeah, I no longer have reliable internet in my apartment. And by that I mean that my friendly neighbor who used to have non-password protected interwebs now has some sort of uncrackable code and I may have to break down and actually pay for internet service but I kind of can't deal with that at the moment.

For those of you who participated in the Great Dress Debate (or whatever) - I wore the blue flower-y thing to the rehearsal dinner (even though Scuba Steve and I liked the other dress better) and the tan brunch dress to the brunch. I also wore cute heels to the brunch. Which was dumb, because I did this to my foot at the wedding:


Other than mutilating my tragic baby toe, I had a great time at the wedding festivities. Of course, Guy-I-sort-of-dated-and-who-moved-to-NY-without-really-telling-me (GISODAWMTNWRTM??) was hanging on his ex-serious-girlfriend the whole time and there were absolutely NO OTHER single people at the wedding, but I made the situation better by drinking several bottles of champagne and tearing off the top of my foot. And my speech was fabulous and I only cried at the end which made all of the other girls cry. And there was a dessert bar with "decorative" large sized creme brulees and I may have taken one back to my seat and devoured the whole thing but dammit I fit into my dress at that point so whatever, I deserved dessert. It was the perfect final distraction before this last month of bar review. So thanks for the votes, I will let you know when I get the stitches out (especially you Namby, who almost lost your breakfast at the sight of my mangled toe).